Appearance – Budget looks as you would expect at this price range (6 for £1 at Pondland!). The snowflake was a nice change from a star but doesn’t save it.

Mince to Pastry ratio – IT HAS AN AIR GAP! An air gap I tell you… Imagine making a pastry case this poor and then deciding, “Hell, lets only half fill that”.

Mouthfeel – Overwhelmingly claggy with dry crumbly pastry. Unsure how it is possible to make a filling this sticky and lumpy yet runny. Kudos due there, but not in a good way.

Flavour – Devoid of any real flavour, meaning there is little point suffering the unpleasant textures. The Good Housekeeping Institute must be taking more bungs than Sam Allardyce to recommend this.

Summary – Exceedingly good? Exceedingly Shite!

Santa Rating – No Santas

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